We really are lucky.

As I was leaving Emerson's 9 month old appointment yesterday, the doctor called to me, "Nicole, Emerson is so lucky to have you, Brian and Ella as her family." I replied to her, "No, we are so lucky to have her." That was the first time I have said that and really, truly meant it. Don't get me wrong I love my daughter very much, but I haven't associated the word "luck" with her. For a long time as I was still grappling with the WS diagnosis, all I could think about was how "unlucky" I was. For Pete's sake, with odds at 1/20,000, how could I possibly have a child with a diagnosis of Williams syndrome. If I won a large sum of money at those same 1/20,000 odds, people would consider me extremely "lucky", so because I have a child with WS does that make me "unlucky". I really don't feel that way until I get that sympathetic look when I tell someone new about Emerson's diagnosis, it is a look of "unluckiness". How can a child be anything but a blessing. Even a child with something as "unlucky" as WS. I feel like in the five months since finding out she has WS, I am no longer dealing with the "why me's". I know that it just is what it is. Our path in life has shifted slightly and we are going to do the best we can with it. She has taught me so much already; the strength of my relationship with my husband, the blessing of un-ending patience, how it is better to ask for help rather than try to appear like I have it all together, and the love and importance of my family.

I guess I'm just feeling particularly reflective today because of her 9 month Well-baby appointment. Yesterday, the Williams syndrome diagnosis once again just slaps me in the face. Before today, I was basking in the fact the Emerson doesn't cry quite as much, is eating better, is more interactive, and is starting to make some good physical gains. And then along come the 9 month developmental questions (ie., Is she crawling?, pulling up, playing patty cake, playing peek-a-boo, blah, blah, blah) and my answers, "no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, and no". How depressing... However, when I really got to thinking about it, WHO CARES!! We are happy. My family is healthy, safe, and content. Emerson is just going to do things at her own rate and in her own time. We are learning and growing from her. She already has taught us to slow down and to really appreciate life. She has taught us to enjoy the miracle of growth and development. We relish smiles and celebrate the seemingly smallest of accomplishments. We truly enjoy both of our children. I have no idea what the future holds for Emerson or for that matter Ella. What I do know is that as long as they live in a home that is warm, safe, and full of love they will succeed to the fullest of their potential. What else can a parent ask for.